Chapter 12: 1742-1748, Marrying out of meeting

Thomas Ellis was now one of the most respected leaders of the Society of Friends in that part of Pennsylvania. In fact, he was the leading elder in the Exeter Monthly Meeting, and he was very conscientious about protecting his reputation and the way in which he handled his religious responsibilities. Even so, ensuring the proper moral behavior of his flock was often a difficult and thankless task; and that fact was about to be underscored by circumstances which developed within one of the most prominent families in the congregation.

2 Sarah Boone, the oldest daughter of Squire Boone, had fallen in love with a neighbor who was not a Quaker. “You know that a disorderly marriage will not be tolerated amongst God’s people,” her father told her. “But John is a good man, father, and I love him,” she replied. “Honor thy father, daughter, and do not bring him to grief,” her mother said in a soft voice.

3 “It is too late for all of that – I am carrying his child!” Sarah blurted out. Now her parents felt as if they had no choice – Sarah was allowed to go forward with the marriage.

4 Thomas liked Squire Boone, and he dreaded the duty which had fallen to him and two of his brethren in the faith. He knocked on Boone’s door and waited for a response. Slowly, the door opened and revealed Squire and his young son Daniel standing before him.

5 “Squire Boone, we would have a few words with thee,” Thomas began. “I have been expecting this,” he replied with a sigh. “Come in, friends and find peace here,” he offered. As they took their seats before the fireplace, everyone was quiet and filled with nervous anticipation.

6 “We are here to speak with thee about the fornication and disorderly marriage of thy daughter Sarah,” Thomas told him. Squire nodded. “As thou knowest, it is thy duty to bring her up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord,” he continued. “Thou must set a good example in this matter for thy other children, and for thy brothers and sisters in the truth. Therefore, thou must confess thy fault and repent of thy sins before all, so that thou mayest be restored to thy proper relationship with the Lord and with them,” he finished.

7 Squire was silent for several minutes as he stared into the fire. “We understand, and we thank thee for thy concern for us and our family in this matter” his wife finally volunteered. “Please be assured of our sorrow and repentance,” she added. After they left, there was another long period of silence. “This does not feel right,” he told his wife.

8 A little less than five years later, the issue arose once again with the marriage of their eldest son Israel. This time, however, Squire would not be silent.

9 “A man must know how to rule his own household,” Thomas began. “My children have always honored us,” Squire protested. “Thy son has unequally yoked himself with an unbeliever,” Thomas gently reminded him.

10 “She is a good girl from a good family,” Squire replied. “Thou knowest that we cannot control who our children love,” he defiantly added. “Thou knowest that thou will not be permitted to have fellowship with us until thou hast acknowledged thy fault and confessed thy sin,” Thomas concluded in exasperation.

11 “I will not stand in thy way,” Squire told his wife after the others had left. He, however, never attended another meeting of the Quakers. And, later that same year, he gave his son Daniel his first rifle and taught him how to use it.